we should all bring him candles to replace the one he made in the movie. he learned the hard way that rock stars don't make candles.

My love for Roger has now grown deeper due to the movie clip. I will definitely have a purple candle in hand at The Boro show in August. I think we all should bring him one, too.

dear god that was funny. i felt like i was watching bad late night public access. y'know, it's really great to see meeks show everybody who's boss. and the slash and geddy lee comments were just classic. guess it shows who's pushing 30.

matt meeks-mere band manager or comic genius?





exactly.

That was some seriously messed up stuff. I really enjoyed seeing Roger's house. Who would've guessed he's a fan of The Godfather?

If they made "How To" videos featuring the Features' fans, what would yours be about?

man oh man, that was great. i love seeing their houses; and i love how parrish was like, "I'll fix it". i have a new found love for roger since the viewing of this video.

if i was going to make a how to segment, I'd show the world of features fans how to get drunk. id perform dazzling stunts like taking tequila shots, jello shot preperation, chugging a beer of two, and exemplify the complete ratios of whiskey to water. teach a few drinking games, along with the irish drinking song by the drop kick murpheys.

in the same vein...

i would show them how to properly pee off of decks/porches while drunk. i would demonstrate the perfect arch...

i'd have my brother demonstrate how to roll a joint or clear a bong. however, i'm sure a couple of the features could handle this as well. p-diddy is so blitzed in that clip.

i'm sure you're right. it's always important to have at least one person in a band with such skills...

Are these candles for a romantic mood? I may need to borrow some someday in case I ever get action.

so true. let's just hope that this action isn't with roger...

You hope for what you want to hope for, I'll hope for what i want to hope for

i can respect this... he would have all the candles you need

Just so you know, candles are a good mechanism for "setting the mood". I just thought that I would leave my input. Candles are definitely some of my favorite things.

note to self...

Hmm. I could probably demonstrate how to talk someone to death, or I could give some killer swimming lessons. Isn't that right, TF?

...he's actually on the bottom of a pool somewhere right now.

Hilarious. Keep the new content coming.

Yes, you tried to teach me to swim, and I almost drowned. However, you were very quick to get that long pole and save me... but not before poking me in the head a few times.

OK... OK... I confess. StephanieW is an excellent swimmer and a wonderful instructor with many, many years of experience.

Thank you. Thank you. We shall have lessons again sometime if you like.

Maybe I could do a "How To" segment on talking back to customers and pissing them off. That would be fun to make.

you could do how to refinish a bed

Good idea! I could do how to reupholster chairs, too.

yep. you certainly could. maybe i could come in and smash them at the end

How to load a Pez dispenser.
How to sleep through undesirable opening acts at Features shows.

you could never sleep through the lucky guns, dude.

am i the only person that enjoyed the lucky guns? they were like lynyrd skynyrd on speed... minus the ballads...

Yeah I liked the lucky guns. I don't think I'd buy a cd, but they were pure energy live.

When I saw them, I was too intrigued by the mosh pitting and fighting in the crowd to sleep. I bet I could fall asleep during the first song and wake up when the Features were setting up if I wanted to.

yeah, i'm the same way. they're one of those bands that i would never talk to after the show, out of fear that they might kill me or spit at me...

(i'd rather they kill me, and save me the shame of being spat upon...)

(Edited by damon at 11:21 am on Jul. 20, 2002)

i was going to say something about the lucky guns, but it's no secret that i don't like them.

contrary to damon's beliefs, they're harmless if you're a girl.

i can't say the same for the scary guy from the katies and the other scary guy from the fluid ounces. once at a party, they locked me in a bedroom and made me listen to something one of them produced until i said it was good. that was a long night.

but i'm a boy. would they harm me?

i got your back

that's cool. i'll be packing heat just in case. i feel safer knowing you're there.

Which member of Fluid Ounces could possibly be scary?
Seth Timbs is skinnier than any Feature under that tie.
There are too many other people to list who have been Fluid Ounces, none of whom are scary (save perhaps Ben Morton).

The Katies, however, are all scary. Their bass player is a redneck.

-Various forms of office entertainment involving dry ice.

-How to pour an MDE gel.

I think you hit the proverbial nail on the head. Ben Morton was a really nice guy but was oddly intense at times. "Scary" definetly works as an adjective to describe him at times.. and maybe even as an adverb.

As for ole Gary from the Katies - he's apparently really nice as well (I've never spoken with him that much) but out of control on stage.

Scariest Features member? I'd say Matt or Rollum.. but probably more-so Matt because he's got "crazy eyes."

Michael

matt has very crazy eyes...his silent type personality is almost scary.

the one that locks me in a room.

i don't recall his name because it wasn't important, but he said he was also in spike and mallets.

note to self: log in before posting.