Ok...in the past few weeks on the highyways and byways of Nashville the following have happened...

A dog food truck overturned
A mouth wash truck overturned
And a beer truck overturned

Is this an alarming new trend???

no, but that would explain all the chubby drunks walking around with minty fresh breath.

(Edited by carligula at 5:41 pm on Nov. 17, 2003)

Why can't the beer truck overturn in front of my house??

Tee-Hee. I'd like to see a truck full of ping-pong balls overturn.

Are you sure you didn't mean dildos?



this is my joke for the day

a couple months ago a truck carrying liquid chocolate overturned in brazil and not only were kids licking up the chocolate but people were rolling around naked in it! gotta love brazilians!!!!!!

am i the only one really interested in what slappy-white has to say?

(Edited by Superflks at 1:43 pm on Nov. 21, 2003)

Probably.

nice

poor slappy-white. seems as if the features message board tradition continues.

Well, I guess it would be one thing if he was the first person to create a name and never post. However, that happens all of the time. And poor nothing, if he wants to post, he will. I see nothing poor about his situation.

sarcasm is sometimes hard to communicate through the internet, it seems.

No, I got it. I was just a little annoyed by your comment about the tradition continuing, though it was masked by sarcasm.

(Edited by richarddawson at 2:11 pm on Nov. 21, 2003)

Yeah, I'm pretty nice. You fucktard.

Today my roomate and I went to the Frist Musuem to look at pretty photos by Jack Mitchell. We lied about our age (I know it's only 2 years, but I don't like passing for 17) and got in for free. We drew pictures, and enjoyed the exhibit very much. It was a jolly good day out on the town.

Sounds nice. I'm jealous.

I stayed inside and got cabin fever....baaaad. Now I just feel like getting drunk.

I went out and feel like getting drunk. Some feelings know no bounds. Click on the cool link in my signature for some of his stuff. The Warhol avatar is one of his photos, as well.

Man, I just bought some macaroni and cheese and was going to make it for dinner. I don't have any milk. Somehow I don't think my powdered coffee creamer will do the job. Popcorn it is....

You're not nearly ghetto enough. Use water. Milk is expensive, yo.

Water in the Mac & Cheese???? Blasphemer!!

Sorry uptown girl, when you're living hand to mouth that extra $2 for a gallon of milk is hard to come by sometimes.

Uptown Girl? Man, why do you think I bought the mac & cheese? Because I'm loaded? Dude, it was .99 at Walgreens today!

If I got paid enough, I would be eating sushi every night yo!

Uncle Tom.

I'm not a slave owner!

..but you told me that you'd be my slavedriver anytime : (

i just found a zit on my.... ELBOW

Damn, I am out of witty retorts.

That refrence to Uncle Tom's Cabin made me think of The King and I, which made me think of Yul Brynner, which made me think of Billy Corgan. I love Billy Corgan.

LEVELS OF MACARONI AND CHEESE:

KRAFT SHELLS AND VELVEETA:
This is primo shit. No milk no water. Just cut open the foil package and squeeze it in. You could nearly have a glass of Franzia with this shit. (I found it very difficult NOT to say "squeeze the cheese" here)

KRAFT MAC AND CHEESE:
Top of the line powder Mac and Cheese product. Yes, you must have butter and milk. Water can pass in times of desperation as well as powdered butter buds. It's creamy and delicious. Good stuff.

KROGER BRAND MAC AND CHEESE:
2nd rate powdered mac and cheese product. HOWEVER, it holds up really well to the Kraft and you save a bit of money. Esp. if they have the 2 for 1 with the Kroger card thing. There's also the white cheese variety in this brand and the Kraft. In my opinion it sucks ass.

FOOD CLUB MAC AND CHEESE:
Mac and cheese quality takes a MASSIVE drop at this stage. If the picture of the bowl with what looks like a pile of snot in it hasn't turned you off the taste will. It's granular and the "cheese" wads up in clumps. Pretty sad shit.

ANY BRAND THAT HAS "SHELLS" "POKEMON" OR "MARY KATE AND ASHLEY" SHAPED PASTA
Is not fucking mac and cheese. This goes against everything mac and cheese stands for.

The only massive fuck up thing you can do to mac and cheese is forget about the mac and it does in fact no matter what brand turn into the FOOD CLUB BRAND (basically the consistency of a bowl of snot)

And I realize I know way too much about mac and cheese.

Thank you.

(Edited by holeypeacoat at 11:09 pm on Dec. 3, 2003)

where does easy mac stand

I have a Billy Corgan story.

It involves a him wearing only a short white robe and watching the Dukes of Hazzard. There's another one about him going to The Underground because he wanted to hear some techno dancy crap and some kid asking him if he "wrote his own songs". He left and went to a strip club after that.

no you didn't

good point

Please tell it, seriously.

I like the Pasta Anytime kind of cheesy pasta goodness. It's rather pricey, though.

By the way, macaroni and cheese sucks, as does any sort of "pasta" without meat as an ingredient. Gross.

(Edited by richarddawson at 11:27 pm on Dec. 3, 2003)

What about alfredo sauce?

Double-gross

Actually..most mac and cheese isn't that great, since I've been burned out on it for quite a while, however, the baked kind where it has a hard layer on top and is creamy underneath is really good. The kind you'd get in a meat and three. And I think pasta and veggies compliment each other much better than meat. Especially in a lasagna. Meat just fucks it up.

Actually, there's not much more to it. It was after their show at the Pyramid in Memphis with Garbage. This was the night after he ended up at the Nashville strip club.

We went back to do the meet & greet with the radio guys and their winners but Billy didn't want people to come in. The rest of the band was in normal clothing, and talking and crap but he was sitting there watching Dukes of Hazzard with nothing on but a short white terry cloth robe and staring at the tv screen. It's more the picture in my head that is just hilarious. Especially since the day before when he was off to The Underground, he was wearing that black flowing ankle length coat and looked very imposing. Just a big contrast that makes me laugh. Not much of a story though.

Ha Ha....too funny!

God, I love the Dukes of Hazzard. (Thanks for the story) The episode of the Family Guy with numerous Dukes references and scenes came on last night. I was so happy.

gweneth paltrow is pregnant with coldplays baby

Yeah, I read that today. I like that you call him Coldplay, by the way.

Yet, it is oddly satisfying to know you're chewing up and essentially destroying the Pokemon...

But Velveeta Shells & Cheese is the best!

Meat is wonderful. Hmm...I should clarify...eating meat is wonderful...no, that could still be taken out of context. I like meat...damnit. You get the idea, but don't get the wrong idea. Lasagna with no meat??? Come on dude, that's gross.

I made a lasagna half meat, half portabello mushroom where the meat should be. It was de-lish. I was cooking for omnivores and veggies that night.

I thought she was more dignified than to do that without getting married first. I can't imagine her having a baby daddy.

Yeah, meat is great. Actually, if you dig roasts and things of that nature, try goat meat, i had it last week at an indian joint and it's pretty damn good. As for lasagna, I used to do italian sausage in it till someone made it with asparagus and yellow squash and all the other usual ingredients. When you add the marinara, then the ricotta, then the noodles it's a pretty rich dish just with that. It's more that the meat kind of leaves me feeling like shit after eating it cause it's just a bit much and the veggie version is a bit lighter...leaves you not feeling so crap.

I can understand that. You make a very good point.

I would like to try goat meat. Thanks for the suggestion.

i thought she was too tall to get pregnant. i mean seriously, how many tall moms do you know?

All this talk of meat is making me crave red meat...

Why would being tall matter?

I had never thought of that and now that I have, it baffles me. I know of zero tall mothers. That's weird.

This is the most red-blooded American that this board has ever been. We're talking about eating meat and smoking cigarettes. For a moment, I will cherish this, only to see it pass.

(Edited by richarddawson at 12:17 am on Dec. 4, 2003)

That justs freaks me out... I can't think of any tall moms either, but most people I know are shorter than me, and their moms are shorter than them.

Geena Davis is pregnant with twins. She's pretty tall, right?

I thought so. She's taller than me, anyway! Whew!

Well, my mom is 5'8 1/2". My Dad is 6' and I ended up 5'11". I personally am aiming to breed a race of amazons someday.

Mummers is five feet exactly, I'm five-two.

None of these tall celebrities have actually had their babies yet, so I refuse to believe tall women can reproduce until then.

My mom's 5'5 and my dad's 5'11, so I wound up 5'8.

LOL It's all a conspiracy...

ill bet that god probably thinks that tall women might not see their infants and toddlers and could squish them with their big feet. it makes sense, really. gods pretty smart.

My mom is about 5'7" and my dad is 6'5". I'm 6'3" and my sister is 5'11" and growing.

yeah, sorry to break this to you, but sis is either a lesbian or barren. jsut trust in god that she will find some other form of maternal happiness. maybe a large dog would suffice?

I'll go with barren. None of her close friends are hot enough to tempt her to lesbianism. As for maternal happiness, she can always adopt a Russian baby, if necessary.

but what if she squishes it? what kind of happiness could she have then?

My Dad is 5'9", my Mom is 5'5", and I'm 6'4". I think I might be one of those Russian babies.

How come everyone is an average of their parents' heights and I am smaller than my parents! ugggh! Mom-5'8", dad-5'11", me-5'4"...what the???

Hey now! I am tall, not a lesbian, and not barren as far as I know! Supermodels get pregnant, and they are tall and starve themselves to boot!

my grandpa confuses me. all of the males in my family have tended to be tall and thin, yet he has popeye-like stature. good ol' grampy.

Does e ever pull out is corn cob pipe and go "ya yuk yike yike yike, where's me spinach"?

damn it's cold! Is anyone else freezing???

Maybe you should invest in a peacoat without holes. Mine keeps me nice and warm. It snowed a little last night. It was beautiful.

I'm cold even with my unholy peacoat. I feel that if it's going to be this cold, it might as well go ahead and snow, too...but no, it's just gloomy and cold. I hate the cold. I wear layers upon layers on my way to class yet still freeze. By the time I make it all the way across campus I have to strip down to the first layer because I'm burning up once I get inside. It's not fun.

By the way, Miss September, I enjoy your Belle & Sebastian avatar. Do you remember that show or are you just displaying your love for the band? Not many people I know remember the show, so it made me happy to see it as an avatar.

(Edited by Sexy Sadie at 6:32 pm on Dec. 11, 2003)

Oh, I remember the show well. It was one of my favorites, along with the show about Koala Bears. It was cute.

And also, I love the band. But you knew that.

As a rabid B&S fan (the band)...I lurve your avie, but you already know that:) Wonder if they have to pay anything to Mdme Cecile Aubry for the name?

Anyway, I agree, freaking snow already. It isn't the temp it's the damned wind that's blowing round. The kind that turns your earlobe purple like they might fall off. I'm even cold in my apt...I'm trying to keep the thermostat at a reasonable level so I don't end up with leccy bills like last year (tune of $300) which fucks my cashflow to hell and back. Time to get some wood I guess...

Are you talking about that one where the girl's mom was always at work and there were two koalas? Came on Nick Jr.? My brothers used to hate when I watched that-they would beg me not to watch it because they hated the voice of the koala.

Noozles? Yeah, it rocked.

lol It's sooo cold. That sucks that you have to mind the thernostat. I'm so spoiled with the heat and air on campus in womack lol I'm forever cutting it off and on.. I've been cranking it here lately. I'd act differently if I had to pay for it monthly of course.

Given the Belle and Sebastian connection, the style of animation would cause me to think it was instead the Nick Jr show with the Koala that was friends with the rabbit. They rode skateboards in the opening credits.

Will

aaah, Belle and Sebastian. I used to love that programme... it reminds me of summer holidays with my sister

We used to call it 'the tongues' because of the animation...

My stepdad is listening to Megadeth. Right now. He sure loves his metal. I played the Features today, and he said it was very, very gay & the whole band should be beaten. Then I told him to go fuck himself. I love being home. Seriously, he's a very funny guy.

Your stepdad might be my brother! Does he have a bunch of tattoos?

Rust In Peace is a fantastic album.

No tattoos. But he likes gardening, computers, and beer as well.

yay! it is snowing!!!!!*
* * *
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Ya know, if I were to open a carpet store, I think I would call it Carpet Diem. Our slogan would be, "Seize the carpet...for less!!!!"

This is the most brilliant thing I have heard all day, possibly ever.

It's freezing in my office too. Only in MY office though. The rest of the rooms are nice and cozy. Unfortunately, if the heat is set so that my office is warm, then everyone else fries. Guess I will keep my coat on!

I'm freezing at the moment, and I'm I'm in Arizona! So much for the "dry heat"...The house is always a toasty 80 degrees (not so much fun in the summer monthes), but I was outside standing in a park in the cold for hours with a bunch of people I went to high school with.

The whole day was kind of surreal. I'm used to being 2,000 miles away, so I never just happen to bump into anyone I went to school with. But we saw someone at the mall, and then there were like 20 people at dinner (everyone in the beginning was like "We have twenty friends!?"), and then some other people from high school just happened to come to the same restraunt and joined our table. And one of the waitresses was a girl some of us knew from middle and elementary schools.

And I got my ears pierced (for the very first time!). My mother wasn't happy. And I found out that my best friend, who comes back Saturday, is supposedly going to run off with another friend's ex-boyfriend (who she's never dated, none of us knew she was interested in, and she's super-smart and going to school in Ohio while he's a druggie slacker). It was probably just something the guy said while under the influence of the hard-core drugs he does...hopefully. Even having that element of gossip back is weird. It's like high school, except everyone looks older and smokes more openly.

You say that as if it's a bad thing.

agreed.

can i run the store in memphis (when it becomes a large mega chain, of course?)

Carpet the day?

Fucking ghosts, man. For real.

Photo!

I love stuff like this.

Shit! You ever been to Carnton Mansion? Used to ghost hunt when I was a wee eenager ..... scary fuckin place!!!! Just a pirate's sail from Nashville as well;)

Ha, ne'er been. Me friends were always to yellow to hunt ghosts with the likes of someone like me. They were afraid of Halloween Haunted Houses, too.....

that place always scared me. for some reason, my dad always takes out-of-town guests to that place (& the confederate cemetery) and whenever i'd take along, i'd end up waiting in the car. this was when i was about 10 years old (but i'd probably still be a scaredy cat about it)

So it's a date .... get your ghostbusters backpack on!

"where do these stairs go Ray?"
"they go up"

hehehe......muhahahahaha ......

Martina McBride sang "Oh Holy Night" on the Today Show just now. My cat Bear was sitting in front of the TV staring at at and when she hit the high note on de-VINE, he started meowing at the top of his lungs. You go, kitty!

I think he's too late to try out for the newest version of American Idol...

he he Feline Idol. we're sitting on a goldmine, people. let's get this started. Okay, now.............. Feature-Fans: Activate!

I woke up with strep throat on Christmas morning. Blech! Now I am feeling better but I passed it on before I knew what it was. Poor Holeypeacoat!

Ha Ha....That is sad, but at the same time, a bit funny.

Glad you're on the mend. I had the flu last week.

I told him to keep away, but he wouldn't! Hope he is ok by Tuesday for the thing at The End...

I went to a movie tonight, and they frisked us. When they went through checking our bags I joked about them frisking us, but I didn't think they really would. No one understood why, until some drunk guy started yelling obscenities - about five minutes later the rent-a-cops came back down the broken escalator (What kind of place has only one? I guess that's why it's not turned on...) and chased after him. We weren't allowed to have weapons, drugs, or outside food or drink. You could, however, have your boyfriend on a leash - and several people did. The whole thing was kind of sketchy, but it was Hedwig and The Angry Inch and three of our friends were in the show.

I hope everyone with strep and the flu feels better!

I put on my make up and turn up the 8-track

And watch my male friends strut around in thongs!

I felt bad for the lead actor's sister, who had to see more of her brother than she probably ever wanted to.