I'm sure by now everyone has heard about the pizza delivery guy bank robbery caper. I clicked on a follow up story at Yahoo news this morning, it was talking about how the cops don't think he was working alone. (I'd put the link here but i'm too lazy). Anyway, the last paragraph of the story was some of the funniest shit i've ever seen in professional journalism. here's the quote...(Wells is the driver who got his head blown off):

"People who knew Wells have said he couldn't have acted alone. They have described him as a quiet man of average intellect who had little ambition outside of listening to music and working part-time in his pizza delivery job."

I'm serious. That's really what it said. Sounds like a character in an Onion article.

I've not heard of this story. please elaborate. and that is super funny. sounds like my ex boyfriend . . .

Well, I guess there's lots of stuff going on that is still conjecture at this point. Basically what happened is a pizza delivery guy walked into bank with a bomb around his neck, handed the teller a note explaining what was going on, got the money and left. He was pulled over by the cops down the road, and he tried to explain that he was forced to do this, but the bomb went off while he was sitting in the back of the cop car. Head blown off.

Most people think he delivered a pizza somewhere, the people he delivered it to put the bomb on him and forced him to do all this. Somehow they new the cops got to him and the detonated the bomb via remote. But nobody really knows for sure what happened, which adds to the bizarreness of it all. The cops did find a handwritten map and note with instructions in the car of delivery guy. (Somebody had been watching some Tarantino movies). Anyway, this is a real deal thing, not an urban myth. It really happened last week.

I should note that it was the description of the delivery guy as an Onion-type burnout that I found hilarious (and a tad disrespectful), not the bizarre tragedy that happened to him.

I think I found my epitaph. After all, isn't this the best we can all hope to be said of us when we die?

God, this is too weird & sadly hilarious to be true. Although yours is a funnier & sadder story, it reminds me of a guy I read about on cnn.com today who had his buddy package him in a crate and air-freight him home to his parents. He thought it would be cheaper than flying: it cost $600+, a oneway plane ticket would've been about $300.

Choice quotes:

Man's mother: "My husband asked him, 'Man, what are you doing in this crate?' He said he was coming home."

Man: "I'm sitting there thinking, 'Oh God, I don't know why I'm doing this. I'm sitting there thinking like any minute somebody will notice that there's somebody sitting inside this crate. No one did."

I saw this story on CNN too. To me the most hilarious part was that the man's mother was too embarassed to be interviewed on camera. Ha!

(Edited by jamiecarroll at 3:52 am on Sep. 11, 2003)

thems be some crazy stories.

Ok, one more. A kid gets pinned under his jeep and uses his jack to lift the jeep off of himself. See here. Cool, right? His insight into his resourcefulness:
"I didn't want to cut my leg off like the guy who cut off his arm". His dad's only comment: "Maybe this will slow him down a little".