Me and some friends were going over these today and they made me laugh. Here are some of my favorites:


I wish I was a squirrell so I could bust a nut in your hole.
Is that a keg in your pants? Because I can see myself tapping that ass.
Your like a parking ticket. You've got "fine" written all over you.
You look like my third wife. "How many wives have you had?" Two.


Alright, I'm through.

are you from tennessee? cause you're the only 10 I see!

my favorite though is:
ya know, i'm no fred flintstone...but i can make your bed rock.

There are 265 bones in your body. How about one more?

Do you know the difference between a hamburger and a blow job? (No.) Wanna do lunch?

hey wanna come over for a pizza and a fuck?

what? you don't like pizza?

I've actually had a guy ask me if I was tired, because I had been running through his mind all day.
I laughed in his face and asked if he was serious. He just walked away. HAHA!

I was once told that I was "bangin like sub-woofers".

hi.......not you, hi.


can I buy you a fish sandwich?

(Edited by deevol at 10:30 pm on Jan. 15, 2003)

Rachel, you are not old enough for this topic.

UGH! whatever dad.



grrr.. patronism (is that a word?)...

Some guy once said to me:

"Did you wash your pants with Windex this morning?"

I of course said "No, what are you talking about?"

He answered " Because I can see myself in them"

uuuuugh

Favorite rebuff to a stupid guy slobbering in my direction:

"Just because your IQ and my bra strap size are the same number doesn't mean we have anything else in common. Go away."

rachel, hun, don't worry, you're plenty old for the topic. and i think the word you were looking for is "patriarchy"

you must be milk bc you do my body good.
you must be lucky charms bc you're magically delicious

my fave...

hey, can I eat you out?

I think she was looking for "patriotism"

Those pants look good on you.. but they'd look better in a pile on my bedroom floor.

As in a take on 'don't patronize me', I don't think so.

I'm with deevol on this one. Just patronize, not patronism.

patronization. trust me.

Hmmm... am I sensing some bitterness over a failed pick-up line here?

I'm sorry. That was cheap.

Message board exile to begin in t minus 4, 3...

more poeple should use the phrase t minus 4...3...

it gets me every time.

I heard this joke today and I think it fits well in this discussion.


James Bond walks into a bar by himself, sits down, and does nothing but stare at his watch. The woman sitting next to him asks "Are you being stood up?"

"No, Q gave me this new watch today and it's quite facinating", replies bond.

"What is so great about it?" she asks.

"Well, for one, it uses a new gamma technology to communicate with me telepathically."

"Oh yeah, what's it saying right now?"

"It just told me you aren't wearing any panties."

"Ha!", she exclaims,"I sure am!"

To which Bond replies,"Crap, damn thing's an hour fast."

"I only have 3 months to live an I wanna spend them with you."

"Your name must be Mickey because your so fine"

"You be the Dairy Queen and I'll be your Burger King: You treat me right, and I'll do it your way"

You going to the party tonite? (What Party?) The one in your mouth. Everyones coming.

that's great!!!!!

My best pick-up line is:

"Hi. I'm Tom Foolery."

It works every time!

pick-up lines are so rehearsed so people should just be themselves...