so i get free cable in the apartment which i've called home for the past ten months. however i've been without a set for the six months or so. my friend, tim finally gave me a set which is a dial set and only picks up about eight channels on a good day. eight is better than none...thanks tim.

so after a night of viewing i now know...

-i need a flat hose
-dennis miller is a far right winger, however, quite funny
-the dorrito's girl/host from spy tv (whatever that is) is dumb as a venecian blinds, but kinda cute
-david bowie rules
-conan o'brien has bad hair
-i need an above ground swimming pool
-i need to buy some baseball cards
-tech tv rules
-jennifer connely does not have a beautiful mind
-dave chappelle is the best black comic ever!!!!!!!!
-i'm pretty sure the guy from 'minority report' is peter from 'office space'
-miss cleo is no longer on the t.v.
-bloomberg t.v. sucks ass
-i really need to exercise
-nevermind. i'm not gonna work out and be on a t.v. dating show, hopefully elimadate. it would be funny to have a tubby drunk fanboy on the show. i'd keep steering the conversation towards lou reed, iggy pop, and bowie in a threesome. they'd be like 'what?' and i'd say 'you know that song in the carnival cruise line commercial that's like 'here comes johnny yeah again....' hopefully i'd be the one white guy on the program that night.

I don't usually watch TV a lot, aside from the Sunday Night Sex Show that comes on Oxygen and of course the World Cup. (Let me note that I hate those channels typically...like Oxygen, Lifetime, or Women's Television.)
The late night stuff is the best, and I agree with you about Conan's hair. As for Ms. Cleo, I haven't seen her on there in a while. AND, the dating shows always crack me up. There is this show called 'Cheaters' that is just horrible. They spy on mates that could be cheating then expose them. Why in the world would you want the break up of your relationship on TV? Ah, the motives of people today confuse me the majority of the time anyway.

in my defense, I will say that I really like lifetime. the golden girls is my favortie tv show.
secondly, I watch dating shows every night with my roommate and my favortie is Rende - view. er, however you spell it. no good with spelling. good with dating shows.
the girls on elimidate are such whores! generally speaking. the way they tromp all over each other trying to have sex with the guy first. its sick.

'Hey Peter, man, check out channel eight!'

you should receive that channel wrangler.

ah, sorry man. i thought you'd want to see that...

scrubs is a really funny show. there is a marathon on thursday

scrubs really is one of the funniest shows on tv. my friend pointed out last night that the humour is a lot like that in airplane(!)

(Edited by damon at 12:25 pm on June 26, 2002)

scrubs comes on thursday in nashville? i love that show-its one of the only things that is helping me with my fear of medschool.

i think it is on.. there was a marathon on tuesday of past shows and i think it said continued on thursday. hopefully i'm not misleading anyone. it's HILARIOUS

I figured that I would revive this topic since our lovely friend damon has brought an interesting show to my attention. I don't tend to watch TV, and I don't watch MTV that much either...But, there is this show that comes on later at night on weeknights...It is called Undressed. This, my friends, has to be the funniest and dumbest show EVER. They have managed to put High School kids with sex in the locker room situations along with girl on girl action in the same 30 minute show. How impressive is that? The acting is just horrible, and the message isn't all that great. (Since the message is "Fuck everything in sight.") Sorry for the crude language, but that's what it is..fucking.
Anyway, I thought that I would share my insight and ask anyone else if they have seen this show. If I am not mistaken, it came out a couple years ago and got shafted pretty quickly. I sometimes watch it for a laugh. You all should watch it just once and give a reply. I am interested in other opinions on this show. Lord, I laugh just thinking about it.

it's the greatest show since seinfeld!

...ok, maybe not, but it makes me laugh.

I LOVE this show! It's a really bad teenage soap opera on Viagra. Seriously, about this time last year, I was FOLLOWING this show. No joke, I was watching it Monday thru Friday, at 11 or 12 or whatever time it comes on, ADDICTED. The interesting thing about Undressed is that it's made up of several little storylines that all have different writers. These storylines don't have anything to do with each other. Also, each season, the show has a completely different cast.

Whoops, that was me. Forgot to log in...

Best, and by far the "guiltiest" guilty pleasure I have. I don't know why, but its so addictive, and occasionally MTV will run all 5 of a week's episodes back to back, and so you get all of the storylines from beginning to end in an evening.

Will

i don't know if i'd be so quick to admit that if i were you.

I could easily say that I am becoming addicted to "Undressed" as well. They usually run at least two episodes back to back, so that takes the place of me watching "The Sunday Night Sex Show" sometimes.

That's another show that makes me laugh. Sure, the things she addresses are serious sex questions with serious sex answers, but you can always expect certain things to happen. It doesnt matter which show...There will always be either: 1. The ripping open of a condom and the placing of it on her index and middle finger; 2. The use of the red and blue dolls to symbolize sex positions; or 3. The showing of a model penis, usually a dildo.

I think that my favorite thing about that show is when she makes the comments/words of advice at the end. She always has a saying that rhymes and pertains to safe sex. All I have to say is that woman is definitely secure in her sexuality.

as she says on the show, all of the products are tested by herself or members of her crew. those are some bold people.

"Honey, I brought home a dildo and some anal lubrication... think we could try it out tonight? I swear it's for work..."

You must really have a thing for TV shows about sex.

Wasn't there another MTV set of programs that were a lot like Undressed but featured older, twenty-something people? I think it was called Spider Web or something like that?

it's obvious that she is a sex fiend...

ha! my best friend/roommate and i would watch undressed during the summer and sometimes during the school year. we always get addicted because they show them back to back and well, you just have to sit and watch one more show! i remember that spider web show or whatever...undressed is way better.

wow. i thought i was the only one who watched this awful yet addictive show. apparently, i was mistaken. seems like all of us would be missing a tiny peice of our souls without the presence of these wacky, sex-crazed kids. let's all take a moment ot appreciate them...

undressed should be the official show of the features message board.

I'm retiring if this proposition is passed.

The past 3 days I have been just outside of Knoxville on vacation with my cousins. The cabin we have has satellite (which is where I get my Game Show fix) and all the music stations (MTV2, VH1, MuchMusic) were all doing either punk shows or playing the red hot chili peppers. MTV was showing undressed. We watched it and I had no clue as to what was going on, but my cousin who is 2 years younger than me knew the entire backstory to every plot. I was amazed.

I'm not addicted, but the show is entertaining.

so be it. we must have progress...

But, I don't want Ceeze to retire...
Maybe I could persuade him to stay onboard...I will try my best.

i am hoping that by the time i have children shows like "undressed" will have made the parental sex talk obsolete. the show is kind of like a drug, but not a glamorous drug like heroin. no, a dirty, shameful drug like crack. i am getting my fix right now. and nice zach signature by the way.

Line from "Undressed" for the night: "Orgasms are momentary. Grades last forever."

you do that. in the meantime, i will promote undressed...

As they say, there's no party like a Zach party!

Okay, I'm the only one who says that.

And I've never actually said that...um...anyway...

who is this greek sounding character?

Zach Galifianakis is a comedian who has been on Conan O'Brien multiple times and has his own Comedy Central Presents... episode. I first saw him on this special and I thought he was hilarious. Fast forward to the beginning of March. His show debuts on VH1 entitled Late World With Zach. It is hilarious, has great music (Shins, Starsailor, Frank Black as the theme), Zach has a great sense of style, the show is awesome. My friends and I (HaveSomeSoma definitely included) became huge fans of the show. We rented his movies (the Oscar worthy Heartbreakers, Bubble Boy, and Out Cold) and I taped 24 of the episodes. Then three months after it's debut, VH1 announces that the show has been canceled. My friends and I took action. We made fliers and distributed them throughout Hastings, our school, the MTSU campus, and pretty much everywhere. We even sidewalk-chalked-up the MTSU campus. We tried desperately to save the show but...those wankers at VH1 canned the show.

Since then I have felt a void. Zach was a great show. No matter how bad a day I had had, at 10 PM, Late World made me laugh. Now I have to sit through Creed Behind The Music. Actually I don't sit through it, I punch my fist through it. Okay not really, I don't have that much testosterone.

ANYWAY, Zach is awesome and if he gets another show, I advise all of you to watch it.

Whoa, whoa, WHOA. I've seen 2 out of 3 of those movies, and I love Jennifer Love Hewitt, but I hope you're kiddng (about Oscar-worthy).

oh yeah, i know who you're talking about. i never could remember his last name, so i made up random greek sounding names when referring to him.


so you're the ones...

(Edited by damon at 6:15 am on Jul. 15, 2002)

Um....yes those were definite jokes about those movies being Oscar worthy. We are convinced that Zach just needed money. I mean...why else would one do what he did in Out Cold?

Yup. Sidewalk + K-Mart Chalk X Worthy cause = swingin' good time!

yes, of course. if you've never sidewalk-chalked before, you should give it a try. it was great. i'm considering finding another hopeless cause just so i can do it again.

As if you would know.

Hey, Hootie & The Blowfish have a new album coming out...

i think hootie may be past the sidewalk-chalk stage. i think they may be more towards the strapping explosives to your chest on live tv stage.

Yeah I guess so.

The child in me yearns to return to the innocent 6th grade days of Hootie. Back when I was only aware of 4 curse words. Back when I was oblivious to the world outside X-Men and the Gin Blossoms.

Of course the child in me also gives me heart burn. Never swallow a child in one gulp. Always chew 36 times.

Geez. Sleep deprivation strikes again.

other things on tv i find enjoyable (although i wouldn't admit to some of them if you asked me in public): personal tlc (ie-a dating story, a wedding story, etc.), trading spaces, the real world/ road rules, and the iron chef. i was also always down with some osbournes action before the season ended. you just can't get any better than lola the pitbull randomly hurling up some gross white stuff (once again proving that puke is still funny).

not from personal experience, but her and this guy i know got it on...

no, no they didn't...

I am so in love with that show. It amazes me how they change the rooms around, build furniture, and completely rearrange a room in just two days. They make some jokes that are funny sometimes (but not often), too. So, damon, we could say that show rules me as well. Mark that down on the list.

How can a person serve two masters, Stephanie? Either Trading Spaces rules you or jamie carroll rules you. Which is it?

On the topic, though... Trading Spaces is at it's best when the woman comes into her newly remodelled room and starts crying. Now that's classic television!

Hmmm. Jamiecarroll does in fact rule me, as does Trading Spaces. I suppose that I will have to live with my life being just that complex. And, while we are at it, let me add another thing to the list...You. So, that makes the list of things that rule me as follows: Jamiecarroll (for the Pudding Pops reference), Trading Spaces (for it's genuine entertainment value), and Tom Foolery (for his amazing skills...and I'm not talking about the messageboard skills either, baby).

Wow. That makes me feel old.

it would seem that you are easily ruled and obviously slavish in nature. not even a modern day símon bólivar could liberate such a person.

Again, not that you would know.

it's clear enough that i wouldn't have to know. you have three masters.

Ditto. I was talking to StephanieW, and she mentioned that she was in 8th grade when Alanis Morrisette's Jagged Little Pill was released. That made me feel old.

Although it has yet to be proven, I strongly suspect that I'm the message board's oldest regular poster. I think I'm almost Matt Pelham's age!

we respect your wisdom.

How old are you?

jamiecarrol- once again i find myself strangely arroused by your avatar.

Today, I am exactly 26.69863. (Seriously, I calculated it out.)

I've been trying to figure out how old Matt Pelham is. (Yes, I could just ask him, but what's the challenge it that?) If "Serious" is accurate and Matt really was seven years old in 1982, he was probably born in 1975, which is the same year in which I was born. However, if he graduated from high school in 1993 (i.e. "Anti-Gravity Class of '93"), he must be a few months older than me. I graduated in 1994, but I was a year behind many people born the same year because I was born in late autumn.

No, none of this matters at all. This just shows how bored I get sometimes.

If you stare at it long enough she blinks both eyes at you.

i'm still trying to figure out what's in her mouth. is it acid?

No matter how many times I see JC's avatar, I think it must be from a porn site.

porn, yes. but not hustleresque porn. something with a little more class, like page 3 (hopefully somebody else here knows what page 3 is)...

Well, it makes me feel embarrassed so you're better off.

I am a new transplant to the watching of Trading Spaces. The only problem is that after you watch an episode you start thinking "Hey, i can just slap some shelves on my wall, no problem." I also enjoy Road Rules/Real World, Friends, Buffy/Angel, Alias, and then Whose Line (UK), MST3K, Maury Povich, Let's Make A Deal, Family Feud, MATCH GAME, Late World With Zach (sigh)...my list can go on and on...

Page 3 Girls? Shit, you *are* an anglophile.

yeah, it kinda makes me tingly. lw makes me tingly, too. is that j-love? it looks like spunk on her tongue

OK, people - rather than have my future wife suffer further disgrace (Page 3...porn...spunk?!), I will set the record straight. My avatar is none other than Jennifer Love Hewitt. On her tounge is one of those valentine candy hearts, with a message on it that reads, "Jamie Carroll rules me."

Don't be alarmed if you feel aroused by repeated viewing of the avatar...it's perfectly natural.

(Edited by jamiecarroll at 5:48 am on Jul. 17, 2002)

it's true...

Damon, I saw that you mentioned in another thread how funny it was that your name is Damon, yet you always have pics of Liam. It reminded me of something. For about 3 years, I had 2 bumper stickers on the back of my car - 1 Blur and 1 Oasis, each on separate sides of the back window. At one time, in England, that would've been equivilent to having a UT and a Florida sticker on the same car.

haha! nice comparison...

it's good to know that somebody else is familiar with page 3...

well said... you certainly have a way with words...

well what do you call it? would you rather me say ejaculate or semen?

man juice would do.

(for the record, that isn't what i call it)

(Edited by damon at 4:36 pm on Jul. 17, 2002)