my favorite asshole is the guy driving in his car with nice cozy seats and a well-working heater who does not let pedestrians cross the street in front of him when its raining at the supermarket (or any other designated area where said driver is going so slowly that it makes no difference). oh there are several others, but this is just for starters.

sina

Me, too. But it's more of one of those "love to hate her" kinda things.

My favorite assholes are people who don't turn right on red, not to mention the people who get in the left lane and drive slowly.

Hmm....I really hate my college algebra teacher who asks if any of us know the name of 14th century french mathematicians only to prove that he is
a. smarter than us
b. loves France and all of its pussiness
c. capable of teaching a lot of stuff that is harder than slope-intercept form (which is what we're doing now...shoot me in the head).
He sucks.

And I want to add HeyLuLu to the list. He's a real douche-bag.

(Edited by DigsySlattery at 2:23 pm on Feb. 21, 2003)

Nice. My roommate is a fan of the French (the land and it's people and their soccer) and we give him hell for it all the time.

OH, I agree. I hate those people. I'll be walking on the river that is the MTSU campus, and people will make me wait to cross the street or whatever while they're being sheltered from the storm in their nice warm cars...so inconsiderate.

I think people are assholes when they completely turn too short and almost take off the the side of your car, but they still manage to look you dead in the eye (With that what the fuck?) look ad if you were the cause of them being a srewed up driver!

I totally agree!! As long as we're on the subject of assholes behind the wheel... how about the people who drive really big trucks who ride my ass when I'm driving at my steady grandma pace (because it's dark and rainy.. and my tires are bad and I already can't see the lines on the road) their damn lights blind me for several miles... and then they swerve around me at a speed JUST perfect for submerging my entire car especially my windshield. . .

In case you're wondering, this happened to me tonight.. I needed to rant. I'm much better now...

I have anew favorite asshole. Tonight, someone told me my car was being towed. it was. so, i went over to the car in tow; here's the scenario (the car is literally hooked up by the chain and has not even begun to be lifted onto the platform) I go, hey guy, don't tow my car. i'll move it. he was a huge fucking asshole about it and was rude to me and treated me like a damn little girl. then he said, "You can't get this back until you pay me $150. I said, fuck you, he said, "now its $200" so i went into the bank and cashed a bad check with my lil tail between my legs. i swear ive never been so pissed in my life. so he let my car go and i hope he got into a wreck and died on his way home with my 150 bucks pocketed in his red neck pocket.

did i mention the fact that i needed that money for a very important doctor bill?

My pick for ultimate asshole(s) are the political religous right, specifically the GOP. They're the ones that like to thump the Bible and shove it down your throat "in the name of God" and they like to discriminate (gays, other races) and call themselves good people for "acting for God's will". It makes me fucking sick.
Oh, and most UT fans too.

~Wash

<--- this guy is my favorite asshole. i mean, just look at him. he never stops scowling. though sometimes i secretly totally relate to him, most of the time he just makes me mad. what a jerk.

Tom Foolery.

My roommate, when she complains of being tired although she has no job and has all her bills paid by her mom and gets to sleep until noon most days...

The rest of the time she is fine, and I have chosen her to be the maid of honor at my wedding. So I guess I don't really think she's an asshole; she is just frustrating at times.

Well I'm not sure if they're assholes, but I really dislike Asian girls.

u must not have any sisters to be your maid of honor because then I believe you would be at the top of their asshole lists lol!

Bite your tounge! Asian girls rock!

Sorry Carl, you can love the Asians but I NEVER will.

(Edited by iwantelvis at 7:25 pm on Feb. 22, 2003)

Woah! Racism!

How do you feel about Asian men?

As long as we aren't worrying about being politically correct.... most men are assholes a lot of the time... I'd say they would be my favorite asshole group by a landslide, too, because I tend to enjoy the company of the typical male asshole more than the less abundant "nice guy." Conflict is just much more exciting, don't you think?

I don't like asian men because they get the asian girls.Kidding aside, people used to not hang out with me, because i was shy and quiet and "nice". Now that I've let my inner asshole out, I have friends. That's a very interesting part of human nature. Actually what's more interesting, is how much women rant about guys being assholes, yet they refuse to date nice guys. I suppose its an adrenaline rush to wonder whether or not you're going to get beat tonight or maybe not until next week.

Maybe I should rephrase that... all people can be assholes.. let's see, can the phrase "It takes one to know one" be applied to this? It's something we all have in common.

People tend to attract those that are most like them.. or at least that seems to be Dr. Phil's theory on it.

What do you think?

So true, Ceeze. So true. Except I think that the adrenaline rush comes from wondering whether your boyfriend is cheating on you. It keeps you on your toes, you know? But I wouldn't want to be beaten.

(Edited by jamiecarroll at 6:43 am on Feb. 23, 2003)

Don't ever quote Dr. Phil again. It makes me sad that his brand of pop-psychology is saturating the media right now. As a follower and student of real psycholgy, I can say that it makes me want to stop taking my medication and go on a killing rampage...again. I can relate this entirely back to Oprah, and her evils plans to A)convince all women to rise up against men in what will turn out to be the prophesied cataclysmic gender war or B) start a massive death cult with the end result being mass suicide by means of poisoned femine hygeine products.

Oh, and JC, as for the beating/adrenaline part, I was exaggerating to prove a point, but I'm sure you knew that. I think your contention about relationship fidelity is probably more on the nose.

(Edited by Ceeze at 4:22 am on Feb. 23, 2003)

My relationship record only lists "nice" guys, aside from the very first guy when I was in High School..I learned my lesson, thanks. I have a thing for nice guys, and it's pretty lucky for me, b/c most of the girls my age never seem to treat them well enough or don't want to date them.

Truer sentiments never stated...

Will

Recently Rejected

Stephanie: I have a thing for nice guys too. I have always been glad that I am not attracted to assholes like so many others. It has saved me lots of heartbreak.

Wiyum/Will: I'm sorry. Women can be even crueler than men, I think.

The Dr. Phil reference was sarcastic...

Yeah, I was just using it as a chance to rant about Oprah.

jeff tweedy is my favorite asshole.
ryan norris is a close second.
tweedy only wins out because of his minor celebrity status

The Lawnwrangler is my favorite asshole... he gave me a ride home once and let me sleep on his couch... of course since so many people refer to me as an asshole, that's a compliment

man, he talks a lot of people into sleeping on that couch.

i have my ways...

"i don't think you an asshole royal, i just think you're kind of a son of bitch"

Jeff Tweedy did the soundtrack for an Ethan Hawke-directed movie I saw last night called Chelsea Walls. The movie tried too hard & was boring, but Kevin Corrigan, Steve Zahn, Uma Thurman, and some mini-Sam Rockwell guy were all in it, so that was ok. I don't recommend the movie, but I thought you Wilco fans would be interested.

My thoughts on the attraction to assholes topic: I find that my attraction to assholes is mostly a superficial/ fantasy kind of thing. As an analogy- most of us probably aren't wanting to settle down with and bring home the people on the porn that we consume. So, while assholes may be exciting & intriguing, in real life the nice people will always win. In a strange parallel: I enjoy being an asshole (in a joking way) on the message board & I think other people being assholes here is funny. But if I/they acted that way in real life, I would not think it was funny at all.

Really? Am I alone on this? I'd love to marry some of the midget clowns featured in my collection.

Ted Turner...

And Darth Vader.

I think the Dark Side in general is a pretty big asshole. I mean, they killed Mace Windu and forced Yoda to live in dirt. That just isn't cool.

Having momentarily forgotten the topic I thought you were naming a porn duo. Then I realized that they were merely assholes and stopped laughing.

that is soooooooo funny.

god my cat is pissing me off. he keeps pushing some magic erase button that erases my posts. so here i am again, typing the same thing i typed a few minutes ago.

darth vader is my fav asshole. good call. i think guys are bigger assholes then girls, but womyn are insane so it kind of evens out.

i don't feel like retyping my thoughts on asshole attraction.

George W. is an asshole...

He sent my friend away...

Yes, he is. And I hate him.

I'm sorry about your friend.

I think that is the saddest thing I've ever read.

(Edited by Brother Love at 1:42 pm on Feb. 25, 2003)

ooooh, he is an asshole, but he's not my favorite. i hate him too much for him to be my favorite anything.

sorry about yr friend. that is really sad.

indeed

how did that work?



Hey Ray Davies... What do you call an asshole? Janet or Dave?

(Edited by damon at 4:33 pm on Feb. 25, 2003)

Dave?

...no, johnny bobo...

we had spaghetti at my house three times this week . . .

"lead, follow, or get out of the damn way"

~ted turner

my favorite assholes:
-the girls who wear those HIDEOUS timberland high heels and walk extremely slowly through the hallways (and there somehow never seems to be a way around them)
-people who aren't polite (no excuse me/sorry after they run into you)
-the asshole who walks on the wrong side of the staircase in everyone's way (apparently some people think the bar is for decoration)
-the asshole who thinks that running backward in a hall of 400 people would not cause him to hit someone
-people that talk way too loudly
-my teacher who, today, would not correct my final grade (which i worked my ass off for!) because "it is only a few points, it doesn't really matter"

sorry, i had to vent.

One whole year later and it's still Sina.

Love you, bitch.

I work at MTSU's library. This being said, my favorite assholes include:

- The guy who repeatedly asked me to touch his ass when I was just trying to check out his books.
- People who do not possess a basic knowledge of the dewey decimal system. Inexcusable.
- Kids who do not know their professor's name, class, class number, or have any piece of paper in their possesion that contains this pertinent information.
- People who loudly talk on their cell phones in areas where people are attempting to studying.
- The sorority/ fraternity people who ask to use my pen to sign the sheet for academic probation when they have one in their backpack/purse and are just to lazy to get it out.

(Edited by iwantelvis at 5:01 pm on Feb. 23, 2004)

Sorry about that iwantelvis... I just had an itch and my hands were full...

The thing that angers me the most is when people cannot read, don't care to read, or are embarrassed to read correctly the names of candy in our candy case. I swear, is it so hard to say "Sqworms" or "Buncha Crunch"? For these two, I have gotten the following botches: Squirmy Worms, Nuclear Worms, Gummy Worms, Sour Worms, S. Q. Worms, Bunch Bunch, Crunch Bunch, Cruncha Buncha, Bunch Bites, Crunch Bites, Nestle Bunch Bites, Nestle Crunch Bites, etcetera, etcetera, ETCETERA!

Then there are the people who orders bags of "corn" and a "pop." I know that "pop" is just a regional thing, but a bag of corn? A bag of corn? What? That's nasty. People order "Co-Colas" all the time and I once got an order for a "Sprizite."

I also don't like it when peole decide to get too personal when you're getting their order. "Man, I can't have butter because I'm on chemo!" "I'm getting over carpal tunnel." And, my favorite said by a middle aged mom as she fumbles through her purse with her children running amuck, "UGH! I'm so stressed, it must be because of the bipolar disease." Thank you for the information.

I think part of the reason that I can't tear myself away from my job is because I like making fun of the people that come through my line...

Oh my gosh Digsy! I am so sorry to laugh at your misery but your post cracked me up-especially all the buncha crunch names!!!! the cruncha buncha did me in

Yes, those two statements cracked me up, I have to admit. Sounds like fun to me.

lol that was freaking hilarious! An so is your Avatar!

The old maintenance guy at MTSU.. I called him over her to replace the light bulb in the bath room. He decides to fix the knob on the bathroom heater above the toilet as well.. and he tells me on the way out. Later after he left I notice that he has put a huge crack in the top of our toilet tank lol... i heard him drop his tools. so now whe have a broken toilet and he didn't fix the heater Like he thought he had.... It wouldn't cut on.. we had to call them back. So they come at 9:15 while I'm about to get ready for class even though I asked them to come in the afternoon.