So, the Features really want to fill Rocketown at the record release show on september 13th and they have decided to use handjobs (manually providing stiumlation to the male sex organ using the hand(s) and optional lubricants passed out at various places to get the word out). Several people have told me that handjobs are stupid and usually indicate that the band using them to promote their shows are lame and are relying on annoying marketing techniques instead of good music.

How do you feel?

Also feel free to suggest additional sources of (cheap) marketing that you think works well.

And I fucked it up. Sorry.

Did I mention I suck?

(Edited by carligula at 4:26 pm on Aug. 28, 2004)

It's gonna take more than handjobs to keep me here tonight.

I think a big jack-off in the Scene and the Tennessean and another clever boner carefully put on local bulletin boards will work just fine. The timing of the show is perfect to bring out all borderline homophobics to the release party of the Features: they won't be able to get off earlier from some other source, and they'll get a free hand job with it at no extra cost. Getting some people to do it at local schools is a good thing.

I really don't know how effective it is to do handjobs. I know I've never come to a show after one. Seriously, I come to this board to keep me stimulated before most upcoming shows.


I know: I'm not mature.

(Edited by YaDaDaDa at 7:40 am on Aug. 29, 2004)

Have missed out on the hand jobs?

Keith already used my account to vote because he's a punk, but I would have voted yes to cars only. What can I say-- I'm a private kind of guy.